Poetry

Without Facebook

I have been without Facebook for a while now. In the beginning of Nanowrimo, I was using FB as a tool of procrastination, but I was spending too much time oggling over other peoples’ lives. I strongly believe that procrastination is a tool. It is busy work that gives our minds the chance to ruminate and discover. But I also believe that there is a fine line between productive procrastination and bad procrastination.

For me Facebook leads to bad procrastination, so I had Fusband change my password and he is under strict orders not to give me back control until December 1st. It was rough at first.

I still find myself going to Facebook out of habit. I wake up in the morning and try to check it; I get home from work and try to check it; before I go to bed I try to check it. But I can’t, and I have learned that it is okay.

Actually, it is great. I have more time now than I did when I was on Facebook everyday. I know this is a simple revelation. Simple addition can tell you that if you take something that is time-consuming away, you will have more time. Until you experience it though, it is hard to fully understand how liberating it can be not to use social media.

Not that I don’t miss the odd stalking, the knowing what everyone is doing all the time. I miss the high school drama of it–a little.

Without FB, I find myself turning to other things to fill that time. I write more, I read more, and I am less inclined to care about the petty things FB allows us to thrive on. I don’t actively seek out other’s FB lives to see if I am winning in the game of life. I don’t wonder if my ex sees how awesome I am doing. I don’t stalk. I don’t wrap myself up in trivialities and turn them into things that matter.

It is freeing, but I am not ready to get rid of my FB account. Someday I might be ready, but not yet. I hope that when December 1st c0mes, I will be able to use FB with more respect. That I will have learned a little self-control (hah), and that I can use it the way I believe it should be used. In order to keep in touch with friends and talking about things that matter.

The proof is in the pudding, and the pudding hasn’t been made yet. If I can’t make the pudding right and I resort to using Facebook as a way to procrastinate badly, then I will get rid of my account. But I am going to try to be good first.

I will NEVER get a Twitter account.

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